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Sunday, April 12, 2015

Musings Of A Muddled Male

A Muddled Reporter’s Lament
By Bob Stevens, The Muddled Male

        Who would have expected so much turmoil to have come into a simple man’s life from a short email penned by a vacationing editor basking in the sun somewhere in a timeshare in Mexico?  The short version of the message was that the two RCTOnline reporters who normally cover the Rich County Commissioners’ Meetings were unavailable, and would I be so kind as to fill in for them at the Commissioners’ first of April meeting.  My first thought was that this was a hoax and I was being set up as the fall guy in an April fool’s joke.  “Nay, nay,” said my editor.  All I would have to do is to attend the meeting in behalf of the AWOL reporters, listen to the discussions and presentations that occurred, and then write up an abbreviated version of what went on.  “How hard could that be,” I asked myself.  So I decided to be a nice guy and do what I was asked. 

        Although I arrived early, the room was already full of people.  And it appeared that the meeting had started without me and I was missing things I was expected to hear and report.  I tried to use the same technique that I use when I arrive late to Church by peeking quietly into the room and when no one is looking, slip quietly into a seat on the back row so that everyone thinks that I have been there all along.  But a kindly person with a smile on her face caught me in mid stride and informed me that I was interrupting a crew meeting and moved me back into the hall and then closed the door to prevent me from becoming part of something I was not allowed to join.  My editor warned me that I might be thrown out, but I didn’t realize that it would happen even before I started. 

        I admit that I concluded almost immediately that a reporter’s life is not always easy.  Especially for an inexperienced reporter like me who was only there because of a desperation assignment.  I want everyone to know, however, that in spite of my limitations I really did try my best.  I came to my assignment packing a laptop, an iPad, a picture of all the main characters with their name so that I wouldn’t blunder and call Joe, Pete, a pen in case my laptop battery ran down, and my hearing aids.  The Court room where the Commissioners meet isn’t the easiest place for an old man to hear.  First of all those making a plea or a presentation to the Commissioners sit facing the Commissioners but with their backs to the audience where the reporters sit.  I tried turning my hearing aids up.  I tried turning my hearing aids down.  But no adjustment corrected the noise from people talking in the hallway outside the court room door, or the sound of a copy machine kachunking out copies somewhere in the region of the Courtroom.  And as hard as I tried I never figured out how to read the lips of presenters by looking at the backs of heads and watching ears wiggle. 

        In spite of all that, I accept responsibility for any error that may have resulted from me misunderstanding what I thought I understood, or editing out something that should have been left in.  It is interesting to note that I have been writing the Muddled Male column for about seven years.  In all that time I have received two telephone calls and two emails.  Oh, and there has been a long time correspondence with a special fan in Hamtramck, Michigan who is also a good friend.  Of course there is my sister who says she thinks my articles are humorous, but she is partial to me because I have always been such a nice brother. 

        But with the article I wrote this past week regarding the Swan Creek Garbage Pickup Problem, I received two personal contacts and two telephone calls within two days of the article being published.  All of this is a preface to telling you that a correction to that article has been included in this edition of the RCTOnline.  Thank you for being readers and for feeling strongly enough to contact me …. and for speaking kindly rather than threatening to clean my clock.

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