Pickleville Philosophy

Rice Crispy Revenge

By Jim Stone, The Pickleville Philosopher

I love to fish, and fisherman maybe are kinda known to, on a rare occasion, tell a little fish story. Not really a lie, just stretching the truth a little teeny tiny bit. It’s hard to explain but sometimes a small fish kinda grows into a huge monster fish!  

So today at the store I had a gentleman come in and he was very ornery, kinda one of those people that no matter how nice you are to them they are just not very nice.

Anyways he needed three boxes of Rice Crispies. He almost threw them up on the counter while saying some not so nice things under his breath.

I always treat customers very respectful and nice just like I did this man, but he just let me have it for how the price was way too high and he could buy it way cheaper at Walmart or a bigger chain store which is very true.

He left the Rice Crispies on the counter and snarled at me while saying he wouldn’t pay that much.

“I’m going to town to a bigger store to buy my goods,” he snapped as he walked out.

I know the same item downtown in Garden City is about one to three dollars more plus it is four miles away.

I had a feeling that he would be really rude to the people working at the other stores when he saw the price of the Rice Crispies and he would return here to be rude to me again, all just to save a couple dollars.

Well, I decided to pull a fast one on this very rude person. I was going to be a little rude in an indirect way. Not say anything rude just treat him nice and keep on smiling. (Maybe laughing a teeny bit in my mind).  So I pulled all the Rice Crispies off the shelf and put them in the back room so the shelf was empty.

I know that it wasn’t a very nice thing of me to do and I would ordinarily never do this, but this guy kinda had it coming to him. Well sure enough, twenty minutes later here came old ornery pants. I had a feeling that he would return to be rude again. 

 

Sure enough he went to get the Rice Crispies and they were mysteriously gone.  Well this is where the fisherman, and not really a blatant, lie comes in.

I like to think of it as stretching the truth just a wee bit.

Mister ornery came up to the counter and said. “I left three boxes of Rice Crispies on your counter and I want them.”

“Well sir I’m all sold out and there’s not any more on the shelf.  I won’t have more until next Tuesday.”

“Where did they go?” he shouted.

“Well sir, I’m the best price in town.  I sold them right after you left to a really nice lady who is going to make homemade Rice Crispy treats for her grandkids. Sorry I can’t help you out sir. If you go to Walmart or the bigger stores downtown I’m sure you can find some Rice Crispies for your needs. Have a nice day sir.” I smiled.

Ha ha, he was speechless and left the store without any more rude remarks.

I kinda felt bad.

Now that’s a big fib.  I didn’t feel very bad at all.